Seeking happiness is partly choosing to find interesting things to do, but it ismostly a mental skill--learning how to make every activity as interesting and funas it can be. The more we begin to look for creative ways of generating interestand enjoying ourselves in difficult or unpleasant situations, the more skilled webecome. I have seen people learn how to be happy in many "impossible"situations.
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Yet, most of us fail to notice the obvious connection between our thoughtsand our emotions. We make no attempt to discover or understand the hiddenmental structures that generate those thoughts. Yet, these underlying mentalstructures are at the heart of our personal power and happiness. If you want to behappy--especially in the long-run--explore and develop these important parts ofyourself.
No matter how self-actualized we may become, sometimes we will feelanxiety, depression, and anger. Those feelings are not bad. They are simplyinternal feedback that our inner subparts are out of harmony with themselves ortheir environment. These negative feelings are really opportunities for growth. Theyare telling us that our current approaches are not coping well, and it is time tolearn a new way of thinking or a new route to happiness. Many of our greatestpersonal growth spurts occur because strong negative emotions help us focus onoutdated beliefs or habits.
Once we understand the causes of our emotions, then it is time to find newways of coping with these causes. We can change our thinking and our actions.We have external and internal routes to happiness. External routes to happinessfocus on our actions and the world outside our skin. Internal routes to happinessfocus on mental means of achieving happiness. These mental means includeexamining our beliefs, our sensations and perceptions, our stream of thoughts,and all other internal phenomena to achieve more harmony and happiness. Someinternal systems, such as the executive self and the Higher Self, are potentiallycenters of great power and control. These parts can attain direct control over ourthoughts and actions (and will be topics in later chapters).
Understanding what causes us to get in this state of "flow" or harmoniousfunctioning can help us learn how to achieve that state more often and spendmore of our time being interested and enjoying what we are doing. Learning howto achieve this state of peak performance, peak learning, and peak happiness willbe a topic of later chapters. You will learn specific methods and routes tohappiness for converting negative emotions to happiness.Return to beginningGo to next section of Chapter The BOOK (free download): Go to Contents of Dr. Stevens' book, You Can Choose To Be Happy: "Rise Above" Anxiety, Anger, and Depression.SELF-HELP INFORMATION: FREE SELF-HELP materials available on this web site (click here to see list) ORDERING the BOOK: How to ORDER You Can Choose To Be Happy SHAQ QUESTIONNAIRE: Free Success and Happiness Attributes Questionnaire (SHAQ) to assess self on many factors including HQ-Happiness Quotient EMAIL DR. STEVENS: Email feedback to Dr. Stevenststevens@csulb.eduI welcome your comments about my web site or any of its contents. Self-Help and other resources on this website (and site map)
When you feel like your talents and skills allow you to serve others and are part of something bigger, this can give you a sense of purpose, fulfillment and long-term happiness. Everyone wants to think that their life has meaning. Deeper, longer-lasting happiness grows as you make a positive difference in the world. 2ff7e9595c
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